If You Are A Bathroom Reader, You Are Not Alone.

People read in the bathroom for any number of reasons, including the guarantee of privacy, a considerable amount of downtime and the lack of external distractions. Unless the current occupant happened to have won a hot dog eating contest.

Some people have been known to read in the bathroom even without the usual gastrointestinal motivation. The bathroom provides an atmosphere free of external distractions such as blaring televisions, loud stereos, rambunctious children and ringing telephones. Some people may prefer to read in the bathroom rather than disturb their spouses with a bedroom reading lamp late at night. In fact, it is not unusual to find filled magazine and book racks in many people’s bathrooms.

As I write this article my boy friend, sitting next to me says that he used to carry pornographic magazines to the bathroom in his much younger days. ‘’Aww man that used to be a lot of fun’’ he admits pretty shamelessly with a mischievous grin.

This is a favorite pastime of many people and a source of amusement to those uninitiated in this pleasurable activity. As a child I remember the bathrooms in our house always had a collection of books and magazines thoughtfully left behind by someone who knew how important these were to help while away time.

Escaping into this room was a common ploy resorted to when one wanted to peruse something undisturbed by others clamoring to read the same book or magazine or section of a newspaper. Locking a bedroom door didn’t always ensure uninterrupted reading bliss as there were other claimants to the privacy of the room. This was a haven where no one could possibly ask what you were doing with the door shut.

Sometimes one caught a glimpse of a sibling frantically searching for something to read before going in. The desperation in the quest was dictated by the urgency of the call of nature. It was a race against time as the material remained as elusive as a will o’ the wisp. Finally, one decided that time was running out and so settled on reading whatever was available in the room. One couldn’t afford to be choosy at such a time.

The reading habit is not really appreciated as the reader takes his time, determined to finish the absorbing novel he has just started while a queue forms outside. At first the knocks on the door are gentle but when this action sees no reaction, there is a thundering of knuckles in unison with harsh words of retribution. After a long pause, the occupant emerges with a look on his face that says that his patience is wearing thin. Met with a barrage of complaints, he coolly says, “Do you mind, I was taking a bath”. This is countered by the accusation that no one could hear the sound of water running. And then the eyes of the spectators fall on the book in his hand and they have their answer.

In the case of the friends’ get-together, the battle of the bathroom occurred on days when the party had to leave at an unearthly hour in the morning to start a long drive to take in the sights. There were calls of “I’m first” followed by “But hurry up, you take so long to have a bath”.

And then there’s the latest development in this pastime. A friend tells me that her husband takes his laptop into the bathroom. I kid you not.

You do it. Yeah, you know where you read this. Go ahead. Admit it. Your turn to talk….